Many of the themes of the dreams involve being trapped, or captive. What could this mean? Do I feel trapped? in my real life? I have a good life, I don’t long for anything. I want to be satisfied with reality. I think I am. I don’t know what I would change if I could change something. So is my subconscious telling me something? If so I don’t know what the message is. Do you think daydreams can be interpreted like night dreams? Night dreams are based on your subconscious trying to fix you. But they say daydreams are your desires and longings, I don’t agree. The things in my daydreams are not happy things, not things I long for. They are struggles, sadness, fear.

how to deal with stress?

I am so irritable lately. In a bad dip of depression and anxiety then hit with a financial crisis that left me so stressed I can’t think. The DDs came on so strong and I was so weak from all the stress that it has tormented me ruthlessly. I am at a loss of how to regain my sanity. I tried walking but it just increased the anxiety, I can’t be still enough to meditate. I just want to scream. I may have to give in and take a nerve pill. I wish I could do something.

Memories real or fake

Still trying to get a grasp on the why of all of this. Sometimes when I am fighting to stop the dreams I keep my mind busy by analyzing the content and trying to figure out why it is or where it comes from. It seems that they are mostly surrounding certain scenes. Making up a story to either start with that scene or get to it. Like taking a snapshot and trying to imagine what was happening before or after the picture. The crazy thing is that I didn’t take the picture. Or I don’t remember taking it. The scenes/images that the dreams surround are the biggest mystery. If I could remember, did I see it in a movie? read it in a book? or live it in a repressed memory? I fear I am driving myself insane trying to figure it out. You wouldn’t believe the options I’ve considered. Mind control project projecting images in my head, seeing into a parallel dimension, etc. The not knowing is the hard part. How do you fight an unknown enemy? I can’t ask anyone for help. I have but they either didn’t believe me or had no clue how to help.

Sprites and Pixies


in the dim light of twilight the creek bank twinkled with emerald green  specks of light. Everywhere the low light of my headlamp went glistened with the magic little lights. Pixies? Sprites? The Irish earth spirits? It was magical to see. As I got closer and closer, I could see the magical little creatures. Tiny little spiders spaced out every few inches. Hunting I presume. I was surprised to find that it was spiders’ eyes making the beautiful sparkling green lights. There is magic in creation, and beauty.


Do you want to sleep allot? I seem to be sleepy all the time. I just want to lay down. It is the only time my brain shuts up. Sleep. A rest from the mental clutter I’ve had lately. Like an introvert in a crowd of talking people. My mind gets so noisy I just want to scream “shut up!” How to find a quiet place.