Intro music- Slot-pred; GooGoo Dolls-Iris; Three days grace-pain
Why do we put ourselves through it? Fear, anger, and grief woven into a daydream. We cry, fell fear, sadness, all in our dream world. Can we control it? Is it linked to depression? Do we want to feel pain? Lets discuss our negative daydreams and look for ways to get them under control.
Looking at why we daydream negative or traumatic events. I have noticed in lots of posts in the main forum that many of us seem to have little real emotions or feelings. Cold, empty, are some of the comments I’ve seen. I too have very little feelings or emotional response in real life. I think the drama we create in our daydreams is feeding the need for emotions we lack. A traumatic event in my daydream will make me cry, for real. I very seldom cry in real life .Same thing with love and joy, no matter how bad my DD gets I always bring it to a happy ending., sooner or later. It may take days to get there. The feelings I get through the DD are a high, that I can’t get in real life. Does anyone else feel this way?
The negative emotions that you experience in your dreams can reflect the feelings you have in waking life. When you dream, the part of your brain that processes emotions, that conditions you to fear certain things and that is responsible for your reaction to threatening situations – your “fight or flight response”- is active. At the same time, you don’t have the need to repress your emotions that you do in waking life. As a result, negative emotions can seem more intense when you dream than when you are awake.
In our dreams, we tend to experience more negative emotions than positive
emotions, even when we feel more positive in our waking lives.
Do you find that to be true? As far as quantity, are most of your DDs negative? Even those of mine that are not dealing with negative themes still don’t have a joyful feeling to them. I am always struggling to over come something, to fit in, to survive. When things work out, the DD seems to end. A different one will start. I have tried to stay in the “happy” place. Tried to keep DDing about the good life I finally achieved in the DD but I can’t keep it going. Then my brain will start skipping back to very emotional scenes from that DD or an older one. The I finally give up and a new challenge starts.
According to the evolutionary theory of dreams, this is because our dreams
are designed to teach us how to deal with difficult, dangerous situations.
Dreams teach us what to do if we are being threatened by dangerous
creatures or if we have to fight to survive. Thus, it is common for us to
have dreams in which we experience fear or anxiety or dreams in which we
are so enraged that we become violent.
Jung would say that if you examine the negative emotions you have in your
dreams, you can identify emotions you have been repressing in your waking
life. Acknowledging and understanding these emotions can help to improve
your emotional well-being.
So your subconscious is constantly bringing up your emotional flaws. But what if it’s things you can’t fix? You can’t change the past or even control your own mind, at least for me that is. A broken vase can be glued back together but the cracks will always be there. So why does our mind insist on pointing them out?
A dream that you are angry can be a sign that you are angry about something
in waking life, but you are unable to express your anger fully when you are
Such a dream can also be a manifestation of your natural aggressive drive.
Freud believed that everyone has an aggressive drive, but we often repress
this drive so that we can function in society.
Alfred Adler thought that anger was the basic force that drove the mind. He
believed that your anger would be revealed in your dreams if you repressed
it in your waking life.
I think it is hard to pin point what emotion is most common in my negative DDs. At first I think anger, but when I think about it, I’m not sure. Maybe it’s mixed with other emotions. Like the response to betrayal, would that be anger? or sadness? both?
The waking nightmare. Do you feed on fear? As many people there are who love horror movies, there must be something to the need to feel fear.
Dreams in which you feel frightened can be expressions of the fears you
have in waking life. These dreams can teach you how to deal with your
fears. If you are able to have lucid dreams, you can make a conscious
effort to face the thing that is frightening you in your dream.
Is DDing somewhat like lucid dreaming? being awake you can try to control the DD. I very seldom have night dreams and have never had a lucid dream.
A common dream is one in which you are being chased. Such a dream can mean
that you are avoiding a conflict or a difficult situation in your waking
Now I had a reoccurring DD about being chased. It was an incomplete scene, I never could finish it. It just kept jumping back to the beginning. Very bothersome. I tried writing it down on the WildMinds forum to see if that would help and it did. It went away. So maybe expressing a DD can get it out of your subconscious. I’ll share it with you and you can get a glimpse into my strange brain.
There is snow everywhere, no sound, silence, the way it is when there’s deep snow. No rustle of leaves or chirping of birds. All the earth watches in silence. I can hear my heavy breathing, and the pounding of my heart. With my head down I watch my feet in fuzzy boots, breaking through the snow disturbing the flat white surface of the field as I go.
Then the silence is broken with the bellow of the bear. I look back, it’s closer, gaining ground. It’s fur ripples across the muscles as it thunders along with much longer strides then mine. I look forward, the cave, can I make it? The opening is too small for the bear, if only I can make it. My chest feels like it will burst, my leg muscles ache and are so tight, I expect to fall at any moment.
Out of the corner of my eye I see a figure. I look, it’s a man. A tall man draped in fur, running diagonally towards me, holding a spear. He yells something but I can’t understand him. I keep running, and running, I can barely breath. I hear the bear bellow again, I don’t look, just keep running, the cave is so close. I reach the cave and squeeze thru the opening. I collapse against the back wall.
The silence of the cave echoes my heart beat. It thunders in my ears, my head aches from the sound. I try to catch my breath. I strain to hear anything from outside. What happened? I wait to see if the bear’s face will appear at the cave’s opening. But instead, the man’s face appears. He has long sandy blond hair with war braids on each side of his face. He peers in with his ice blue eyes. He tries to enter but he is too broad. Then he reaches his hand thru, beckoning to me. He speaks but I can’t understand his language. I look at his hand, is he my rescuer? My miracle? Or another predator? Should I trust him?
I gently take his hand. He tries to pull me thru but I jerk my hand back. He presses his face into the opening. I reach up and touch his cheek. I look at his eyes, the windows of the soul. He has tender eyes. Maybe I can trust him. I can’t stay here. I have no food, no way to build a fire. I would not survive the night. He extends his hand again, I take it. I squeeze thru the opening and we look at each other. He turns and starts walking thru the snow. And I follow him in silence.
If you dream that you are frustrated about something, it can be a sign that
you are having trouble coping with an issue in your waking life, or that
your life is not going the way you want it to go.
How do you know you’re frustrated in a DD? I think that is the same as anger.
So why do we have negative DDs? Is it a yearning to feel a strong emotion of any kind? To feel alive? Some people say they feel their MD is a gift. I love the worlds and characters they have created. I consider it a curse, a sickness I want cured. Maybe due to the fact that most of my DDs are negative. If my DDs were positive, happy, I might relish them. Instead they are a constant torture.
wall flowers- I wish I felt nothing